Same Old, Same Old: How I Feel Stuck In A Loop

Things feel as if they are on a loop at the moment. The same things keep happening. The same thing keep going wrong. I keep doing and saying the same things, which are detrimental to myself and to others around me.

I need to break this cycle. I know that eating a large bar of Cadbury’s Caramel won’t do that, but it tasted good. I’ve eaten so much today. Been an absolute pig, but resorted to old tricks so the consequences shouldn’t be too severe.

I know that now would be the ideal time to ask for help. I know I am sliding down the slope towards ‘crisis point’ but my GP is on holiday (I tried to get an appointment today) and I can’t face ringing the CMHT and speaking to Allison or the duty worker. Plus, at this hour of night I’d get the crisis team. What joys!

I guess I’ll just cope alone, as per usual, and go and have a night in my pyjamas watching Coronation Street. Classy life I lead, isn’t it?

Ruth

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10 Responses to “Same Old, Same Old: How I Feel Stuck In A Loop”

  1. Lola Snow Says:

    sounds like your life is as classy as mine. I just f*cked my highlights up in my hair (DIY bleaching is never a good option)
    Unfortunately i wasn’t concentrating and now have a “Dot Cotton” streak in the fringe. Its not a good look.
    Getting into PJs when the world sucks, is definately a great option, I’m thinking after this hair disaster, I may well be living in mine for the next few months.
    Things will have to pick up for you soon Ruth, ’bout time you got a break
    x Lola x

  2. Alison Says:

    Feeling the same and I could just murder a big bar of Cadbury’s Caramel!

  3. Disillusioned Says:

    HUgs. I know how hard it is to reach out for help when the low times hit.
    Sometimes it is easier for me to write down how things feel and post them in a letter – could that be an option for you with Alison? Or even an email?
    Is there another GP at the surgery you could face seeing? Again, I know how hard that can be. I’m lucky at the moment in that there are two GPs I am very happy to see. (Only problem is they are husband and wife so if one is away they both are!)
    Be safe.

  4. Ruth Says:

    Lola: Oh no! That’s why I don’t dye my hair anymore. You could take to living in your PJs, or you could tahnk the fact that the weather is turning awful, plus it’s Autumn and use that as an excuse to wear a very classy hat?

    Alison: If I hadn’t been a pig and eaten it all I would have shared it. To be honest I didn’t enjoy it that much. I think they’ve changed the recipe from when I was a kid. However, Wispa bars are back, so now I definitely feel like a kid again!

    Disillusioned: I could post her a letter but it wouldn’t arrive until tomorrow or Thursday and I’m seeing her on the 7th, so I don’t think much good would come of it. I don’t have her email address either, although I will try and get it in our next appointment as I feel it could be useful to have. There is another GP at the practice who is sympathetic and nice, but i feel as if I don’t want to hassle people just because I’m having a ‘moment’.

  5. wavemaker2 Says:

    I know the feeling!! REALLY! I think we ALL get stuck in a loop round N round we go ALL the darn time.. We just have to step back and try to live outside our loop sometime’s.. And I dye my hair but I would LOVE to have it streaked… LOL But I don’t dare do it myself!! OMGEEZ!! I can’t even imagine how it would turn out.. hahaha So I just dye it ALL, Dark Burgandy!! that’ll do until another 4 month’s…hahahaha It’s a pretty color esp. in the Sun!! til l8er

  6. confessionsxofxaxteenagexrockxchick Says:

    I did that today…It was a large bar of cadbury bubbly, which isn’t as nice as the caramel by far! (lucky you lol)
    I spent the best part of the day in bed…in my pyjamas (you would hope) And I can’t get TV… 😦
    I never ask for help until it’s too late, and even then I seldom do…
    Bless you Ruth, take care xxxx

    What’s wrong with being part of the Classy Cadbury Corrie Club? 😛
    (terrible joke that wasn’t even funny)

  7. Lola Snow Says:

    You will all be very glad to know that I actually messed up my hair sooooo much, that the wierd streak can be hidden by a different parting .Unfortunately that means I am unable to justify staying in my jimjams for the october-february gloom 🙂
    Hope today has been less dire for you Ruth!
    Thank god for Cadburys and soap operas
    x

  8. Alison Says:

    Ohhhh did someone mention Wispa bars… 🙂 yummy!

  9. Ruth Says:

    Wavemaker: I’ve given up dying my hair at all. I always just end up a different shade of red, and usually patchy. I once did highlights in my friend’s hair though and they looked really good.

    Teen Rock Chick: Cadbury’s Bubbly is just not as good as Cadbury’s Caramel. In fact it is a cheap imitation of Wispa’s, which as they are now back should be stopped. I quite like the idea of a Classy Cadbury Corrie Club – count yourself as the founding member.

    Lola: Oh well, you’ll just have to find another excuse to sit in your PJs all winter. Glad the hair is redeemable though. Today has been OK, the weather is shite and making me feel shite, but in all fairness it’s been an alright kind of day.

    Alison: I mentioned Wispa bars. They are lush aren’t they? I’m so glad they brought them back, although I think they should bring back Wispa Gold (the caramel topped one) and Wispaccino (coffee chocolate) as well. I mean you can’t resurrect one of the family without exhuming the rest, can you?

  10. eccedentesiast Says:

    If I was eating and if I was in the UK I’d love Cadbury’s. My excuse over here at least is that they put some weird anti melting ingredient in chocolate here that makes it taste odd. Wonder what my excuse will be when back.

    As for the pjs, I spend half my English life in them. Saves getting changed at night and in the morning and they’re far comfier to curl up in front of the fire with.

    Take care of yourself Ruth, hope things pick up a little x


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